2:05:00 AM

crap out.

I just finish my ' intensive study ' wait ! i missed out SELF-INTENSIVE study .
Woke up frm my nap at 7pm , and the moment i wake up .
check my handphone , no calls nor msg .
immediately , i was pissed off again .
recalled everything and it's like no different from not taking a nap .

Decided to find something to do instead of sulking around my house and slamming my doors or my tables.
I went to study , the moment i studied i didnt think about anything else but my math problem.
so i got very engross in doing and solving the sum ..
until 10 which my show started . The Hills , excellent show , especially their fashion sense.

After the show ended , i went back to study my science-chemistry . I spent 2 hours doing topic 1.1 :/
well , thats cause i'm only a beginner ..
i do without looking at the ans , and i realise its all wrong when i mark.
so , i search textbooks , notes etc . to learn ! :D smart way huh ?
studied till 12?
and took a 30 mins rest ..
played msn games with boyf ..
and he offline just after 2 games.

Anyways , another fuck up thing happened after that .
and my mood for studying was totally ruined.
wanted to study 2 hour of biology , but i end up slamming my books on the table , i practically slam anything within my touch .

I was feeling grumpy the whole day and still i get scolded?
it totally adds on to my boiling anger .

btw , i accidentally broke miss kumari's mug as our graduation gift during the mist of anger.
I was slamming everything .. took my bag and slam it to the floor and i heard the sound of broken glass , i remembered about miss kumari's gift.
when to take a look , its alr broken >.< *sobs.
sorry miss kumari and thanks for the lovely mug altho i didnt have the chance to use it .

So i only studied like 2 question of bio but i really couldnt set my mind into it.
My whole mind was occupied with words like ,' unreasonable .. fuck fuck fuck ... pissed off .. etc .'

Now , i'm slamming my bro's keyboard as i type .
I just have this fustration in me which i dont know how to express.
I'm finding ways to let it out instead of bottoming it in my heart ..
Damn ! i need someone to talk to .

Anws , thanks for ur concern chia (:
U did cheer me up alot when u asked me what happened.
I felt so much better !
Thanks lovely.

And my biggest regret today is i smashed a gift from a teacher i like .
its my graduation gift and i smashed it over nonsensical stuff !
screw myself man . :/

stay tune .


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